The dark side of making things look easy

I don’t need to remind you all that my partner and I are embarking on the biggest adventure of our lives – packing up our lives in Australia and moving half way around the world to London.  This is a daunting prospect for most of us, yet, strangely – could we be projecting an outward perception that it’s no big deal?

Making sure everyone else is comfortable with our decisions

In order to avert any panic or emotional outbursts associated with us moving to London, we’ve carefully ensured that any hardship, effort, nerve shattering concern, expense or horror have been downplayed.  Well, if we’re running around telling everyone we’re scared or spending a medium fortune on this – how on earth can we convince others that we’re doing the right thing here!

Of course, this worked well and people reluctantly let us go to start our new life overseas.  All the while, we are quietly sh*tting ourselves and dealing with endless polarising decisions, isolation, culture shock and of course, the frustration of living out of suitcases.

Does the swan get tired?

You know the analogy – the swan floating gracefully on the lake, gliding effortlessly and looking fabulous in the process.  Oh, what troubles could a swan have?  Meanwhile, under the surface of the water, the poor little legs are flapping a million miles and hour and our dear swan is probably exhausted!

Well, today, I admit that I am exhausted.  This is hard stuff!  We’ve been back and forth from London, my dear partner has applied for countless jobs and been successful in securing temp work and also a full-time job.  But, of course, circumstance then needed me to return to Australia and apply for the my visa and the right to work in London.

We make another tough decision to return to Australia to apply for the visa together (as it could take up to 3 months for approval and processing), which of course means leaving the hard-earned job in London.

Who does the swan confess their exhaustion to?

No-one’s ever going to believe that the swan is exhausted.  After all, they just float around all day don’t they?  So, who can the swan get a little “Oh, I know it’s tough” from?

I feel like I’m in that position right now.  I’m exhausted.  Every time we do something, there’s a roadblock, or another hurdle to jump through.  We’ve returned to Australia and looking for work – Nobody is interested in someone for a short period of time, only to lose them to another country.

On some level, we can’t even confide in each other – We need to stay strong for each other, right?  Seems strange, but the phrase “It’s fine” or “That’s fine” has become second nature and a little numb.

Moving on and moving forward

When you’re exhausted and have most control over circumstance taken away from you, what do you do?  I guess the appropriate thing to say here is “Keep calm, and carry on!”.  But, I do want to reinforce… this is tough!  And things that are tough are usually the biggest builders of character.

We will continue to focus on the bigger picture.  This is something that we want to do and of course, something this huge is not going to be easy.

Next time you’re at the lake and you see a swan looking graceful, don’t forget to throw them a little something.  You have no idea of the effort that they’re putting in to look pretty for you.

Have you been in a simliar situation?

Let me know if you’re been a calm cucumber, whilst you’re busy paddling like a mo-fo!


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